Dating A Younger Guy And Getting Hurt

Alright, ladies -- age is a state of mind. These fabulous women regularly date guys younger than them. Perhaps its time to have some more of what they are having. You just have to be open to it. You have to not overlook this fun pool of potential suitors in pursuit of a traditional older man. But, for some reason, people don't seem as accepting of older women dating younger men. But these celebs don't seem to care about that. And neither should you. Here's why:. Younger men can talk to an older woman and really value their knowledge and sense of perspective. Unlike with an older man who is established, has a career, stress and lots of obligations, a younger gentleman will be interested in you. He will be impressed by your achievements and look up to your success. Over time this may balance out but it starts out with you as the accomplished, independent, cool one. In the presence of an older woman that they are attracted to, chances are their testosterone will get into overdrive. They'll become the best, smartest and most mature version of themselves in an instant. Younger men can have stamina, energy and more general enthusiasm for the activities and social events you enjoy -- dancing, backpacking, surfing, you name it.

Cougar alert: Five benefits of dating a younger man

But a younger man is most likely baggage-free. He would have had less time to be hurt and become cynical and so is more open and optimistic about love. This vibe is endearing, honest and encouraging to be around. This sincerity and positivity can also bring out the best in you. Just imagine, you could go hiking or do the other outdoorsy things you love! A younger man has younger friends, pursues different activities and can have a simpler take on life. This in turn will make you feel more like his age than your own. You should try it, you know? And if not now, when? Sanya Panwar is an online journalist with Hindustan Times. She writes on health, wellness, travel, fashion, relationships, films and pop culture. Share Via. We're now on WhatsApp. Click to join. Hindustan Times is now on WhatsApp Channels Subscribe today by clicking the link and stay updated with the latest news! Whatsapp Twitter Facebook Linkedin. Join Hindustan Times Create free account and unlock exciting features like Newsletters, Alerts and Recommendations Get personalised news and exciting deals Bookmark the stories you want to read later. Already have an account? Sign In. Edit Profile.Your Subscription Plan. Cancel Subscription. Saved Articles. My Reads. My Offers. Sign out. HT Premium. Elections HT Insight. My Account. Sign in Register Free and get Exciting Deals. From Women's Health. The heart wants what the heart wants, and sometimes that means dating someone who is, ahem, a younger man. Sure, age-gap relationships are becoming more of a thing, but there are always those people who will do double takes at dinner or family members who say nothing but raise their eyebrows when they hear about your new boo. At the end of the day, who you choose to date—and why—is your decision. Just get that straight before jumping into the youthful or any, really dating pool.

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The Challenges Of Dating A Much Younger Man Every Gen Xer Should Consider

This also means having clarity on what you need from a relationship. Maybe you need to open up emotionally, a partner you vibe with sexually, or maybe you want a good travel buddy or all of the above. Regardless, don't be afraid to be honest about it—the only person you'd be hurting by covering that ish up is you. To put it nicely, some people, guys especially, have a lot of kinks to work out in the maturity arena. If their a little lacking in relationship history, no worries I mean Duh—you were born in way different years, or in some cases, decades. But expect to feel a new dynamic with your young date compared with the one you might experience with whom you usually go for. To get a better grasp on how mismatched you might be in this aspect, think about what the vibe would be like hanging out with his friend group. Does the idea make you cringe—because it'd feel like sophomore year of college? Remember that. Answer: It could. If you're interested in a long-term relationship and not just fun sex no shame if you aren't!

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Ask them where they see themselves in the next two years—versus the five or 10 you might ask an older prospect. Break out in hives yet? How you define commitment might be how a younger mate sees a fling. Or vice versa. You might just want to have fun and date around, but Young, Hot Eligible Bachelor or Bachelorette might want to start settling down. Or you could be the one who is ready for rings and babies while they're The important part, she says, is to find where you guys align, and put a definition to it. They may not know what they want for their future yet, but if you can agree on a present, that's half the battle. Yep, that. People bring different things to the relationship positive aspects only, please—LOL , but you do want to be able to relate to your younger beau. Otherwise, it's going to be very hard to ever see them as an equal. The main thing to consider is whether they can accept and support the core things that are important to you in a relationship, Sherman says. If you struggle with confidence, dating someone younger could bring up feelings of insecurity, notes Schatz. Be open and flexible literally and emotionally to new experiences: Think cramming into a tiny music venue one night and exploring a new pocket of the city the next. It will become just another number in the numbers game that is this crazy world of modern dating. Experts explain the potential risks — and possible benefits — of peeing in the shower, a common habit. In Marquette's victory in the tournament's semifinals, Golden Eagles head coach Shaka Smart took exception to some trash talk he received. The Canadian pop singer earned serious kudos — and new fans — on "Saturday Night Live. Experts share how to navigate bathroom etiquette and hygiene involving poop, showers, flushable wipes and more.

5 Things I Learned From Dating A (Much) Younger Man

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Photo credit: Raymond Hall - Getty Images. From Women's Health The heart wants what the heart wants, and sometimes that means dating someone who is, ahem, a younger man. View comments. Recommended Stories. Yahoo Life. Yahoo Sports. Yahoo TV. In The Know by Yahoo. The waiter hovering nearby followed suit. Meanwhile, I wanted to slide under the table and disappear. But not before I checked his ID. He was born in ; I was born in I'm about to turn 48; he's about to turn And yet we're in love. Three years ago, Mike and I met at a coworker's engagement party. I knew that the guests at the party were going to be younger than me; I work as an occupational therapist at a hospital and most of the coworkers I'm closest with are the ones in their 20s and early 30s. I've always tended to get along better with people a decade or so younger than me—peg it to my being single with no kids as well as a why not attitude that led me to spend my own 20s and 30s bouncing from guy to state to job. At the party, I flirted with the handsome man making a rum and coke in the kitchen, asking if he could whip one up for me, too. He obliged, and as we clinked glasses, I guessed he was in his early 30s. It wasn't until the next day that my friend revealed he was only

Getting Serious With A Younger Man? What To Know Before It's Too Late

Still, when Mike and I went out for drinks, I barely thought about our age gap until our server asked for our IDs. Mike reached across the table to examine mine. My mom was born in That's so weird. The word rattled around in my head, even after he changed the subject to his upcoming marathon training. I couldn't focus on our conversation. The banter that had come so easily seemed stilted in the bar. I could have been his babysitter. I could be his mom , I thought. Things got weirder. A week later, he invited me to join him and his friends for a hike, followed by a party. I said yes, but as soon as I got to the meet-up spot, I wanted to drive away. Everyone looked and seemed so young. It wasn't what they were wearing—I was wearing an athletic tank top and hiking pants, same as the other women—but they all seemed so carefree. I didn't know them personally, but I was pretty sure none of them had been divorced—which I had by time I was their age. I felt like the two additional decades of hard-won life experience created a wall between me and the group—and between Mike and me.

I felt like a spy. Yes, I'd heard of Drake and Snapchat, but it wasn't my pop culture. For the next six months, Mike and I were just friends. I made sure to regularly ask about whom he was dating, because I didn't want him to think I was interested. He would ask me to one-on-one dinners and drinks, and I'd suggest casual after-work beers instead. I was pretty sure I was going to spend the rest of my life alone, and I'd made my peace with that. To me, it was much easier to make everything strictly between friends. Things changed one night over beers at a favorite local bar when I finally said what I was afraid of: I was worried I'd screwed up my life, and that it was too late to change it. Mike's eyes widened—and then he started revealing some deep stuff about himself, too. He told me about how his best friend had died in a drowning accident in college, and how much that tragedy still affected him, six years later. It was as if by getting to know me on my terms and proving he wanted me in his life as a friend, I'd finally felt comfortable enough to open up in a way I didn't with men I met in typical dating situations. A few more conversations like that and Mike and I became a couple. Or at least other people assumed we were a couple. It took almost six months before I got used to calling him my boyfriend, even as I was surprised by how little people cared. Sure, my friends made a lot of cougar jokes. I occasionally get a side-eye from a bartender when we're both asked for ID. But in general, people don't dwell on our age difference. Two years later, Mike and I are definitely a couple—we live together and we're deeply in love. Even his mother approves of us, saying that Mike has always been one to follow his heart. And my parents are supportive as well.

Is It Okay To Date Older/Younger Men? A Therapist Weighs In

My dad has no idea how old Mike is, and while my mom knows he's younger, she's never asked for details. But they've seen how skittish I am about romance, so I think they're just happy that I'm happy. That doesn't mean problems don't crop up. Mike and I are facing different realities. Although he says having children isn't important to him and that he'd still feel fulfilled without kids, I don't believe him. That's actually one of our biggest fights—and where the age-difference thing comes out in full force. When I tell him Mike he can't knowif he wants children, he thinks I'm being condescending and close-minded. Maybe I am. But I went back and forth on the kids thing somany times in my 30s that I don't want him to shut a door he may want to open in the future. We've discussed marriage, but always in the abstract—like when we went to one of his friend's weddings, we imagined what our ceremony would look like. We talk in terms of a permanent "we"—weshould buy a house, we want to live by the ocean at some point in our lives. That said, while I know our love is real, because of the age difference and kids question, we're both skittish about talking about the future in definite terms. I don't know if we'll be together in five years. But I am also finally okay with not knowing—I know it's enough for today that he and I love each other. Mike showed me that. I got married in my early 20s and divorced a few years later. My experience, plus being friends with so many divorced women, has made me skeptical about love.I used to think of it as this be-all, end-all—you either had the happily-ever-after or it would never work out. But being in an in-between state with Mike—I very much love him, yet understand that neither of us knows our ending—has made it increasingly clear that love isn't that simple. It's about appreciating the moment, not taking a cozy night in for granted, and not letting the time we do have pass us by. He's always the one to suggest heading out to the mountains for an all-weekend hike. We adopted a dog together, which was a really big deal for me. Whenever I thought about getting a pet, I'd always think, What if I moved? What if I couldn't take care of it? What if, what if, what if? Mike helped me realize that none of those questions mattered—yes, it was good to know we could take care of her and had some stability, but that we'd always figure out a way to make things work. In general, he's good at making things workin a way that always surprises me. He wants to try new recipes, fix the backsplash in the kitchen, and invite friends over to make cocktails from the contents of the liquor cabinet. I don't want to make it sound like he's an overgrown frat boy—he's not—but he doessee the fun in life, whereas I tend to get bogged down in details. And the sex is amazing. I'm way more comfortable with my body than I was when I was younger.

Dating a Man 16 Years Younger Forced Me to Grow Up

If you think about it, both of us are in our sexual primes, so it's actually an excellent match. Mike's willing to experiment, and I'm willing to really let go—he loves seeing me let loose, and I love showing him that side of myself. Bottom line: Mike and I are a great fit, because, it turns out, love comes in surprising packages and doesn't follow some one-size-fits-all path. Mostly, loving Mike has made me fall more deeply in love with my own life. Recently, Mike and I went to dinner at my friend Karen's house. She and her husband have been married for 23 years, and they have a great relationship. While we there, Mike suggested that Karen's husband bring out his guitar, and we all sat around the table singing songs. It sounds hokey, but it was reminiscent of the low-key way we used to hang out in our 20s. We'd since forgotten that sometimes you have to stop thinking about past regrets or things you should do and just enjoy the music—even if it's just for an evening. It's like that in a relationship too. Miley Cyrus' Complete Dating History. Media Platforms Design Team. Watch Next. Advertisement - Continue Reading Below. Historically speaking, it has been far more common to see a couple made up of a man who is older than the woman. However, as times progress, not only have the genders of a couple of dynamics become less set in stone, so have the ages. It is not rare to see a younger man dating an older woman anymore. Here, we look to address that dynamic. We look at what you need to know if you are dating a younger man or even thinking about seeing a younger guy.

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There are a few common issues that you may want to think about first before embarking on a relationship as an older woman. Not all of these issues will be present in a relationship where an older woman is dating a younger man, however, one or two could well be. Try to keep an awareness of them and whether they are pertinent to your relationship. This can materially prevent undue hurt in the future and make you feel like you are more in control of your relationships than you have been before. Dating someone will always leave you open to getting hurt, so it can be a good idea to be aware of what foibles of a relationship could be to help limit the amount of hurt you feel in the future. There is no denying that, while younger men dating older women is far more common these days, that you will get judged as a couple by others in a way that older men dating a woman years younger than them will not. While this may not be fair, you need to be sure that you can cope with that outside judgment as a way of knowing whether you have what it takes for the long term future of this partnership. For some, this can be difficult as it means that arguments and issues that may not have been problems with a person with more experience are still ever-present in this dynamic. It can be very tempting when you are dating someone who is younger than you to have a crisis of confidence. So often older women believe that they are less attractive than their younger counterparts and therefore they believe that they will not be worthy of dating younger men as a consequence. Given that older women will have lived longer and through different time periods, it is necessary to remember when dating a younger man that you will have had different life experiences from him. This can sometimes be something to enjoy and value. At other times it can cause difficulties between two people. Younger men tend to have a higher sex drive than older women. If you are dating a younger man, you will therefore need to be prepared that he will want sex a lot more than what you may have been previously used to if you had been in a long term relationship with an older man before. Try to enjoy this higher libido, however. It is innocently meant and will go to improve your confidence about how much your younger man is into you. One of the things that dating a younger man can mean is getting used to the practical side of the dynamic. Given his age, he is likely to have a smaller apartment than you and may well be less settled. This is very much a materialistic issue that may arise from a relationship with a younger guy so if you simply try to accept it as early on as possible, it should never be an issue.

4 Benefits and Disadvantages of Dating a Younger Man

One point that an older woman may need to come to terms with is the likelihood that the younger man she is dating is only into the relationship for a fling. While some women may be okay with this, others will naturally want a more serious partnership. Make sure you know where you stand with one another before someone gets hurt. So often, the younger you are, the less money you earn. If you are in a relationship with a younger man, you need to be totally at ease that you may well have a better salary than him. This can take a lot of confidence from both the younger man and you. Often, as people age, they start to become more responsible. The result of this in a relationship where you are dating a younger man is the fact that you may feel responsible for either him or all the decisions you make. This can be tiring and frustrating, so if you worry this may be the case for your relationship, talk about it. Younger men, in a mass generalization, tend to be more sociable than an older man. Guys nights out are just one of the many different wants that can transpire from an age difference. A younger man will simply want to do and try different things than you may as the older woman. This is down to the amount of experience you have had in the past as well as different perspectives that come from differing ages. It perhaps goes without saying that younger men are likely to be more immature than the older women they are dating. If you are interested in dating a younger guy, you need to be prepared for this immaturity. In fact, you may well need to see it as a huge positive between the two of you.

Thanks to having different experiences in your life, you may well find that your consequent interests are also different. This can be something to be celebrated in some relationships, but some may struggle with the lack of common ground. If this is the case with you, make sure you talk to each other about your interests to at least include one another. Immaturity often comes with another price. Immature people, not just younger men, will often be self-interested as well. If you are a woman who needs a guy to be attentive to her needs and sensitive to your wants, you may struggle with the common self-involved streak that can be seen in young men. If you really want your partnership with a younger guy to work, you may have to make peace with the fact that you may have to change to make it last. This is down to the different situations that you are both in and what could be different wants and needs. Perhaps you want to know if he's texting other women behind your back? Or whether he has active Tinder or dating profile? Or worse yet, whether he has a criminal record or is cheating on you? This tool will do just that and pull up any hidden social media and dating profiles, photos, criminal records, and much more to hopefully help put your doubts to rest. Of course, an age gap dynamic is not always about overcoming difficulties to make it work. In fact, some age-gap relationships work better than others as they can be entirely down to the individuals involved and their personalities. You may find that the difference in age between you and your partner does not affect your connection at all. Indeed, it may help make it stronger. For a partnership to work, you need to have mutual respect for one another.